Thursday, August 20, 2009

Oh, Brother.

Remember brother Greg (again)? Weeelllll, he's been livin' in a trailer down by the river. I think pretty happily except for setting himself a little on fire that one time. Those two times.

Unfortunately, last week he had a severe pancreatitis attack after his post-colonoscopy three Junior Whopper lunch binge. 'Doctor said I could eat whatever I want! Well, I think the Whoppers were just the tipping point in his Dagwood Sandwich Garbage Can Diet. Dude weighs in at a precious 300 pounds.

Poor Greg. He's been in the hospital ever since. Poor Mark when he saw not only how sick his brother was but how characteristically dirty he was. Oh, yes. Greg was a vision in his grimy white t shirt with the sleeves ripped off and his bare feet sporting toe nails that Sasquatch wouldn't dare be seen in public with. So big brother took it upon himself to give Greg aka "Cecil" a little TLC.

First stop before the hospital was the dollar store. Tools were needed. Scrubbing, trimming, and grinding tools. Exaggerating! A little. But I knew I wasn't donated my personal nail kit to the cause, so new stuff had to be got. I dropped Mark off to play beauty shop while Sam and I headed to the store for some fresh t shirts and shorts for Uncle Cecil. We also got him a deck of cards and an electronic slot machine game. Yay!

When we got back with the goodies Greg was shining like a new penny and scowling like an old wet hen. (ya, they scowl alright.) Mark said he used the garbage can to soak Greg's feet. That man of mine! Ingenious.

I have to say, Mark's one hell of a pedicurist. And a good brother, too. Hopefully, Greg appreciates his fancy garbage can spa treatment. You can't get that just anywhere, you know.

9 comments:

Sara said...

Hey, Patti! I just realized that I did these 2 posts: Oh, Brother & Wherefore Art Thou....
You know what I'm talkin' bout! :)

OsageBluffquilter said...

You go sister! My kind of blogger. And that husband of your deserves a big kiss for taking care of his brother like that. Not so sure I could do that for my brother or my sister!

Becky said...

Your husband is a mensch, as I've noted before.

I hope Greg is doing better and is not headed for your basement.

Annette said...

Yes, please do NOT tell me he's moving in to your basement. No, no, no! There's only so much goodness in anyone's heart and then, when it's all used up, you go postal.

Signed, the Murder Mystery Writer

P.S. My word verification is ingeno, which I think should be the new slang term for ingenious.

Sara said...

I even gave him a kiss in spite of his rockem sockem garlic breath from eating 2 jars of pickled garlic. Now who's the mensch. ;) hee!

We converted Greg's "bedroom" into a bathroom. We thought about the tack room in the barn though. Kidding! a little.

Annette said...

Just puhleeze tell me I won't have to feed him while I'm there taking care of the critters.

Not that it could too much worse than the sick mama cow. Or the attack rooster.

Sara said...

lol! I wouldn't do that to ya! Even though the cow was a bit above and beyond...

Just got word that he fell and broke his nose in the hospital. Just gets better 'n better.

Michelle Johnson said...

sorry to hear Greg is feeling badly. hope he recovers soon. mark is a kind man for helping his brother like that.

Analisa said...

LOL. Sounds like how I eat after a fast. Reminds me that I need to paint my toenails. LOL