Pig Bone Fat. I Got Nothin' For A Blog Post.

Check it.

"Fatty acids derived from pork bone fat are used as a hardening agent in crayons and also gives them their distinctive smell."

That special crayon smell? Pig bone fat. Now that I think about it, yes, it's a nostalgic smell, but really, isn't it kind of a stinky smell?


In other news, my short term memory is shot, so goodness knows what we've been up to.

School's out next Wednesday though the girls skipped yesterday to go to Kennywood, and they all skipped today because the girls were tired from Kennywood and Sam uncharacteristically missed the bus. Only half days anyway.

Yep. That's all I've got today. Who wants chicken wings?

Getting In Touch With My Gross Side

Turns out, I'm gross.
Exhibit One:
Regular pants don't fit? Only 2 pairs of maternity? Refuse to wear those sweatpants again today?
Duct Tape, my friend, duct tape. A really sad moment because it wasn't a sad moment at first. At first it was totally acceptable. I was in a rush to get out the door and I thought, perfect!
No. No, it's not. You duct taped your pants. Gross.
Only good thing is I might get famous here.

Grossness, Exhibit Two?

Going shower-less for 3 days and I wasn't camping (but was wearing duct tape pants.) And somewhere in there, sleeping for like 15 hours straight and I wasn't hungover or anything. 'sup with that?

Grossness number three: Septic tank flower garden.
I imagine there's a proper thing folks do with the septic tank lids. Do they bury them? Because I'm afraid to bury them and then we'll end up driving the tractor over them and cracking the lids. Or maybe some bushy ornamental grass? Then it would be my luck we'd have to tear them all up to get to the lids.

Nah, I just let the girls plant flowers to their hearts' content. Yes, with a million and one places around the house to plant flowers, let's draw attention to the poop tank with flowers.
Just going to hope the petunias spread. A lot.

Grossness Four. Now, I could only maybe take half credit for this, but birthing a child who at the tender age of 8 is capable of the most pungent man-like armpit odor in our whole family. A female child no less!

Five. Salami sandwich for breakfast. Debatable.

Ya, I guess a lot of it's debatable, but I was just so not feeling feminine this weekend, ya know? Just.....not cute. Or pretty. One of those weekends.

But how 'bout a palate cleanser?

Awww, neato! A heron outside my back door this morning. Nature!

What else?

-Go kart's broken again. We need to keep parts on stock.

-Lily finally had a friend over after much waiting, and darn, if I didn't forget to pre-warn the mom about how filthy their child is going to get at my house.

Straight to the creek in shoes and socks, thoroughly coat them in mud then strip them off and throw them all over the porch. Splash mud over every appendage. Add a coating of watermelon juice from 2 big slices each. It helps the kitten hair and barn dust stick better. Then, when I shoo you into the tub to rinse your arms and legs, skip that and just have a splash fight. Return from the bathroom every bit as dirty and also soaking wet.

They had such fun though. And friend's mom is totally cool with the creek mud.

-Roses for my anniversary. I forgot to take pictures, but what a lovely surprise at work. Mark, you rascal, you.

-I can slightly, slightly feel a baby moving in there sometimes. A little bit. Just not when I'm lying really still trying really hard to feel it. I am struggling with not driving myself so, so crazy with this whole thing. Funny how carefree I was all those other times. Boy, am I making up for it now.

-I did some laundry. I cut up some fruit. I planted some sunflowers. ;-) I'm just being purposely extra boring now.
Have A Good Monday, Internets!

The Fungus Among Us, Girls Will Be Girls, And I Heart Maternity Pants.

Howdy, Neighbors. 'Tis the month of May and verily it doth truck along.
Morel Mushroom season, but our haul was much smaller that last year's. I think it just wasn't quite the right temperature/moisture combo going on out there in the woods. But we found enough to fry and eat with leftover prime rib one night, and the next night to make a fabulous stuffing/dressing with leftover hard rolls, scallions, and morels baked to a yummy goodness. It went perfect with oven baked rabbit.

Look at the cute little snail.
Last weekend we finally got the part to fix the go kart. That was an adventure in and of itself. It involved a trip to a small town West Virginia cycle shop where the owner behind the counter was unabashedly eating sardines on saltine crackers when I walked in. And that seemed to make perfect sense at the time.
So anyway, fixed the go kart. The weather wasn't cooperating and Agnes and her friend were going nuttynuts. They finally decided weather-be-damned, we're going riding.And so they did. And it took about 5 minutes for them to look like this.It rained and they rode. For hours.
And then the tricky part of cleaning up. Ever notice that it's a lot of work letting kids be kids?
My plan was for them to hose off at the barn in their clothes, come in the cellar where I'd have towels so they could strip out of the mud clothes and then head to the shower in their towels.
Instead, they grabbed the towels and headed to the barn to strip. Dripping wet and still pretty muddy, they trekked from the barn to the back door. OK, not the cellar door like I asked, but no biggie. I asked Where are your sweatshirts? (to go with the other piled muddy wet humps of clothing they left on the porch) and they headed back out to the barn to fetch them, still muddy and wrapped in nothing but towels. So forgetful, these pre-teens.
So then I'm waiting and waiting and waiting for them to come back from the barn because it's like 8:30pm on a school night and they still need to get showers before we take Ag's friend home.
Ah, here they come, still totally unaffected by their lack of clothing. Well, we figured since we were already over at the barn we might as well go see the new kittens...
Well, that makes perfect sense!
Finally they were showered and content, and I was left with the aftermath of mud-filled tennis shoes and a bathtub full of sediment and leaves.
But then when I was looking through the photos I'd taken of their fun, I found this picture of yours truly from about this time last year:

and I couldn't really complain because Aggie gets her muddiness honestly. (sigh, was my butt ever that small?)

In addition to morel and mud season it is also softball season. Both girls are playing and it is quite the time suck. We got home after 9pm last night. I guess I'm just a big rookie at this is my problem.
But I do enjoy watching them, and I'm ever so happy that they seem to be enjoying it because I finally have someone to play catch with!Good memories. Pretty fun watching a bunch of 8 year olds, too. They're like a flock of chickens running around out there.

I took these puppies out for a test drive today: During my 1st trimester misery I was hellbent on staying in normal people clothes for as long as possible. I was pissed when I went to Target to grab a bunch of big neutral pregnancy clothes and they stayed in the bag for awhile unworn. I was sweating the fact that I was growing too large too quickly, but I'm over it. Pregnant four times equals get big quickly for me. So that's my approximately 15 1/2 weeks belly up thar pokin' out. And my growing bosom. Hello! Enjoying that before they get out of hand.

Anywho, glory be, are these pants not the most comfortable thing on my bloated middle? Love love love. Even more than my sweatpants. And they are not nearly so ugly as the maternity jeans I wore 9 years ago. We'll see how long til I'm exploding out of them.

That's all she wrote for now. Happy Mother's Day to all you Moms out there!