"It's Just Like McDonalds: You Get Change Back."

"It's Just Like McDonalds: You Get Change Back." What the hecks does that even mean?


The absurdity of the statement has not stopped multiple customers from enthusiastically using it lately.
I had to google it, too, because I thought surely our humble burg is not the birthplace and residence of such a quotable quote. And glory be! it kinda looks like it is.(Based on my not finding it anywhere else.) (Unless you can tell me that you're doin' it your neck of the woods?) And it's a good illustration of why I was so very desperate to leave this place straight out of high school.


Sure, now I can appreciate it, I came back, but back then I felt like I was living in a Stephen King novel full of sideshow freaks. I can appreciate it now probably because I've become one. ha Haaa!


So anyway, it's the dreaded First Of The Month here at work and all the folks who don't have a bank account, who drive around all day paying all their bills in cash, who then treat themselves to a meal at said McDonalds as a reward for driving around all day paying all their bills in cash, they come out of the woodwork and come to the office spouting words of fun and wisdom.


In fact, I received a kiss on the top of my head from one today. True story.
That was unexpected. Dennis is our sometimes office pet who shows up to eat our donuts and drink our coffee, then has to be told to wipe the food off his face. (Or his tobacco spittle, yuck.)

Another did her best to clean out our candy jar. On at least one occasion she's brought a little baggie with her to carry her loot. We tell her to load up. Why not, ya know?

Heck, I even stopped on the side of the road today to help one who was stranded because her car quit. She was more upset by her lack of cigarettes than her car troubles.


We'll have multiple inquiries along the lines of "I've got my bill here. It says to pay xx amount of dollars. Can you tell me how much I need to pay?" Why none of us has ever asked in return "Are you serious?" I don't know.


Lots of folks coming in with straight-out-of-bed hair. Their kids leaving candy wrappers out on the waiting area floor. We have more than one customer who has a voice just like the witch on Bugs Bunny. We have a guy who wears a shirt with the name "Chet" embroidered on it, but his name isn't Chet. Come to think of it, he's one of the people that likens our office to McDonalds.


But there are good ones, too. A customer brought us some homemade chocolate pudding. Which was weird and scary, but really thoughtful. Folks bring their dogs in to visit. We try to entertain the kids with scrap paper for doodling and lollipops. We love seeing new babies.

So if any of that makes me sound like a stuck up creep, I apologize. Maybe I've posted these little rants before. If so, I apologize. You deserve a break today. heeeee :-)

Lily keeps asking me if she's adopted. Lily, the child that looks exactly like all my baby pictures.
She thinks she's black because she tans more than her siblings in the Summer. And it's not like she's really upset about it, just unconvinced when I tell her she's not adopted. She even seems a little disappointed when I insist that she's biologically ours?
I have a feeling her brother has something to do with it. He's the one who told her to touch the electric fence with a tenpenny nail when she was about 3 years old. I heard her screech from the house. Boy, was she pissed.

I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant. Are you kidding me? (Not me, the TV show!) Have you seen this show? I'm totally sucked in by it because no matter how many reasonable explanations they give for why these women didn't know, I still can't wrap my brain around it. Even women who've been pregnant multiple times before still didn't know they were pregnant.
Babies move in there for pete's sake.
Especially my 'adopted' child, Lily; she used to do this weird rhythmically pulsing kick thing. Not the hiccups, but like some kind of little dance.
I knew I was destined for an interesting child when she was doing that in the womb.


Alrighty then. Is it Friday yet?